18

My Dying Wish

I must have heard the preacher say a thousand times that there are no U Haul trailers following behind hearses. I heard it again by the radio host this morning and it got me thinking about this my dying wish. We all carry a lot of extra baggage. Guilt from things we’ve done or haven’t done. The words spoken in haste or in anger. The selfish thoughts and deeds. The shame over not being the son or daughter you feel you ought to be perhaps. Baggage. Whatever it is. The point is that we all carry around something.

On the day that the prophet Samuel died all of Israel gathered themselves together, and lamented him, and buried him. He had an incredible influence on literally thousands. On the other hand when the rich land owner and herder, Nabal, died there is no mention of mourners or sorrow. His servants and his very own wife disliked the man. Nabal had a lot of baggage. I am sure Samuel did too (somewhere in his soul) but Samuel did not carry it around with him and he lived his life for others.

Nabal only lived for himself.

I want to live my life for others. I want even my act of dying to be an inspiration and help to others. Not in the way that Nabal’s death was of course. I am thinking about adding to my will to have a U Haul trailer pulled along behind my hearse. Not to bury my stuff with me but to be symbolic that I am taking all of my baggage with me. I want everyone to be released from anything they may be holding onto regarding me. Any thoughtless thing I may have said. Any ignorant act. I am sure there are many. Any careless behavior. I want to free people from all of that. I want my friends and family to be able to in their thoughts load all of that up into my trailer and consider it buried with me. Morbid thought perhaps. But I do not want any unfinished business messing with people after I am gone.

Of course, I am going to begin today releasing the people in my life from obligation to me. I want to give out kindness with no expectation of getting it in return. I want to be a gentleman to men and ladies alike simply because it is right. I do not want any un-cashed checks or any unpaid debts. I am going to start unloading all of that baggage now. I want the memory people have of me to inspire them.

I want to be like Samuel in many ways. I do not want to be like Nabal. He was such a man that no one could even reason with him. He was self centered and selfish. He was greedy and thoughtless unless the thoughts revolved around himself. I refuse to be like that. Samuel was for others and loved by many. I want to be always for others. Freeing others. Helping others. So if you see a U Haul behind a hearse think of me. And remember that there is nothing of any value that you can take with you except the love and kindness you have shared.

Thank you for spending this brief time to read about my dying wish.

Kind regards to you always and forever,

Carl

AllMyMentorsAreDead.com

As a side note; this kind of thinking always comes full circle and blesses the bearer thereof.

It is a pay-it-forward mindset without any thought of a payback.
If you have tried it you understand exactly what I am talking about.

I would love your comments below regarding any of this. Your comments often are the only way that I can know you have been here and have been helped here (or inspired or intrigued). Otherwise I only know that several have visited not knowing who. You are free of my expectations but if you’re so inclined would you leave a comment? Either way, thank you again for visiting. Kind regards again, always, and forever.

Carl

18 Comments

  1. Thanks for sharing your heart in this article.

    When my Dad died he left baggage where some of my siblings held a grudge. I did not hold a grudge but felt as if I understood the man and his times and chose to forgive him.

    We can do as you suggest and we should. Those left behind also have the opportunity to release the baggage and should do so… for their own healing.

    Good word brother!

    • Bob thank you for such a quick comment after I posted. Of course it helps that we were chatting on Discord doesn’t it. Bob I deal with baggage almost daily it seems. Most would not know except that I am like an open book much of the time and I am a blurter. There is much I speak that I could keep in. Perhaps much of what I say is TMI but I would rather share TMI than be hiding all of the time. Thank you for your comment again brother — and more for your friendship.

      Carl

  2. Great words, Carl. Jesus sacrificial death on the cross has broken forever the chains that once bound us to our baggage. One of the ironies of life is that we can often see our neighbors baggage. We also can see how relatively easy it would be for our neighbor to let go of their baggage. We can see how much better off our neighbor would be once they and their baggage were separated. Sadly, we often lack the ability, or perhaps the desire, to so clearly focus on ourselves. If Christ has freed us from our baggage – and I believe He has – then, any bags I carry, I carry because I choose to. Regardless of which excuse I might offer as to why I am not free. We marvel at the Hebrews of the Exodus and their never-ending desire to return to captivity. We marvel, but many of us continue to remain in our own bondage.

    • Joe thank you for your insight here. It’s true. So very true.

      Much of the irony here of seeing our neighbor’s baggage and yet keeping our own will be addressed in the pages of the studies underway here. In particular the Higher Ground study addresses this in a big way. But I am sure as we review the words of Jesus in the gospels, and in particular what He said in the sermon on the mount, we will discuss this further there too. It is so very ingrained in me that it seeps out in much that I ever preach or write. Kind regards dear friend. – Carl

  3. Hi Carl,

    no doubt all of us have wronged people at some time, even without intention, but, striving to change that as much as possible is a noble pursuit for anyone. For us Christians, being kind is an act of obedience and a fruit of the Spirit.

    Your post reminds me of a song by Tim McGraw, Live Like You Were Dying; it’s a striking thought, especially when none of us knows if we will be here tomorrow.

    Blessings!

    Edwin

    • I am way behind on my replies; Life has a way of catching up with you even when you’re way out in the lead. You are right about being kind as an act of obedience and we can never go and repair all of the things we may have caused. It is an attitude of being sensitive to the Spirit illumined conscience and then being obedient in this also. I like that title, Live Like You Were Dying, it is so very true that none of us know if we will be here tomorrow (Prov 27:1).

      Thank you Edwin for your comment here.
      Kind regards always and forever, – Carl

  4. I must admit that in thirty-nine years of being saved (38.5 to be exact) I’ve actually never heard a preacher mention the one about U-Haul trailers following behind hearses! THAT’S a good one! I will steal that from you, brother, if that’s okay! LOL!

    Striving to be like any given good man in the Bible and attempting to avoid being like any given bad one is something that should come naturally for any Christian. I believe the Spirit of God within us causes us to desire those attitudes. Paul admonishes us to “grieve not the holy Spirit of God,” and I believe any true Christian (with that holy Spirit within) sincerely desires to accomplish that. After all, what true Christian man would want to be like Nabal, Cain, Ishmael, Esau, Doeg, Saul, Joab, Judas, Simon the Sorceror, Hymenaeus and Philetus, Demas, etc.

    Sadly, though, as Paul also said in Romans 7:14-15, “For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin. For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I.” We do not always do the things we wish or the things to which we’re moved by the Spirit.

    HOWEVER, thank God it doesn’t end there and thank God Paul (and others) wrote more verses, for I find in Psalm 130:3, Hebrews 9:13-14, I John 1:9, Psalm 103:12, and especially Philippians 3:13-14 some VERY comforting words! AND, we also know that we must forgive ourselves before we can ever hope someone else can forgive us for our wrongdoings!

    I also understand and appreciate your point about outward restitution for wrongs we have done. I think that is just as important as the inner forgiveness that must come first! If we’ve forgiven ourselves, what good is it if we don’t make it right with the one we’ve wronged! It’s like committing the wrong all over again! I mean, if I were to make a false accusation against a brother and spread it far and wide by talebearing, what good would it be to simply forgive myself? The false accusation is still out there and unless I try to go make it right (which can never fully happen, because those people I told probably also told others) it would be like I’m still making the false accusation with each passing day! It’s not fixed until I go and fix it! (It’s like us Southerners say, I’m fixin’ to fix it! LOL!)

    Great post and very good thoughts, brother Carl!

    In Christ,

    Donnie

    • Thank you Don for this great addendum to my post. I have not counted them but you may have more words here than my actual post (Lol). This is good! I added a link to each of the Bible verses that you mentioned as it will make a great little Bible study for anyone who happens to read our comment. With the thought of forgiving ourselves; often we have been forgiven and released by God and some very gracious people in our lives but still carry around the baggage unnecessarily. What a freeing realization when we learn that we do not have to! As a side note: It may be 38.5 years for me too. I had a time of wandering away so I am not sure exactly which was real and true, the time as a youth or when I returned as a young adult. It does not matter because I KNOW it is real and true now.

      Kind regards always and forever brother,

      Carl

  5. I used to have a truck load of baggage but I gave it all to Jesus. Now I care not what others think of me or think about what I do, I try to live for only One and it’s only Him I try to please. We can’t change the past so why worry about.

    No matter how good you are there are those who will speak ill of you. Do your best to follow Christ, leave the past behind, keep looking forward. It’s the end of all this, the baggage of life, that gives me hope and faith. The end is just our beginning! Thank you Carl for inspiring me to rehearse these thoughts once again.

    • Matthew, your comment, “Do your best to follow Christ, leave the past behind, keep looking forward.” is a great paraphrase of what Paul wrote in Phil. 3:13-14! It is in the pressing for the mark and being like Him in all of our conversation and deeds that causes us to want to be relational as He was. Surely He never worried about what others thought but He did wish to influence and inspire greater thoughts. This is my hope and aim here at AllMyMentors. Thank you Matthew for following my posts and commenting often. You are greatly appreciated. As a side note: I will be down your way in a few weeks. I will let you know the exact date so we can plan a meal together. Kind regards always brother — and forever. – Carl

  6. The greatest of all is the servant! I am with the Apostle Paul as he said he was a debtor to all. Why was he a debtor to all? It was because of what Christ did for him.

    I too have been given the same gift the Apostle Paul was given. Jesus Christ served us with His life! He taught us that the servant is the greatest of all. He took his baggage with Him. What baggage was that? Our sins! He had none of His own.

    I too must take my baggage with me. As I serve, I will be hurt by others and will hurt others. It is at that time I must forgive even the unforgivable. I must seek forgiveness even when it will not be granted. Yet, at the same time I must still serve others. That is how I will take my baggage with me!

    Thank you Carl

    • Some of the baggage, if I am to be true to “forgetting those things that are behind” and speak to it within it’s Biblical context, are all those things that I once counted gain to me. All of the things that I have done for God and others and felt that it was something to be self-confident in. My titles and roles. My tenure. The tender accolades of men. I count it all loss to gain Christ’s greater riches. Thank you Matthew for your comment here. And for your friendship. Kind regards brother always and forever. – Carl

  7. I found this read to be very touching and I can honestly say it touched my heart. I want this to be read at my funeral and am going to make sure my children know it. We don’t think about all of these things as we go through life. Until it is pointed out to us!

    Thank you, Carl, for this very special read!!

    • Eden I am so very blessed by your comment here. I am speechless at the moment and all I know to say now is Thank You for your kind comment.

      Blessings to you!
      Kind regards always,

      Carl

  8. Carl you made me laugh when you said you might put that request in your will. Only you!!

    But seriously, this is a lovely article. And I have heard that saying many times. As Christians, we all strive to be generous, loving, etc. But we are also human and struggle with sin. I am so blessed to have Jesus as my Savior. Because of His forgiveness, He is willing to unpack our baggage if we allow Him to. We are free to move forward, with a clean slate.

    Blessings to you,

    Suzanne

    • Suzanne I am glad I made you laugh. :0)

      I am so very thankful for the forgiveness that Jesus brought and I have accepted. He is such a wonderful God I do agree. I think that we run the risk of simply dismissing all of our ‘baggage’ as I called it here because it is so easy to let go of when Jesus is willing to carry it for us. I am not suggesting we do not do so but we run the risk of not really getting to the root of why it keeps weighing us down and where it originates from. I will be talking about this in coming lessons I am sure. We run the risk of losing a sense of authenticity or genuineness. I am dancing around a word I do not wish to use as bluntly as others do, we run the risk of walking in hypocrisy. I will explain further in another post.

      Thank you for your kind, genuine, authentic, and frequent responses to my posts Suzanne.

      Kind regards again, always, and forever,

      Carl

  9. I love the U-haul idea! We should all probably have one behind our hearse with an open door for those we leave behind to throw in everything we left behind that we didn’t mean to. Hopefully I will only need the smallest economy-size one behind my hearse!

    • I am learning what incredible freedom there is in unloading all of the baggage now. For years we only learned about and talked about unloading it but never really saw it exemplified. Learning to let go. To forgive and then choosing not to remember or recall. They are tough lessons that get easier with practice. It is more blessed to give than to receive holds true in this area also. Thank you Rob for your comment here.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *